Self Care is not Selfish

In January as the New Year rolled around and my 30th birthday was a month away I knew a change was calling me. I listened to Eckhart Tolle speak it was a clip from Super Soul Sunday. Eckhart said something to the effect of ” You don’t want to get to your goal and end up neglecting your health and relationships. You need to live now the way you want to live when you reach your goal.” It struck a cord in me. I realized I was neglecting the things that mattered the most to me. And I didn’t want to reach one goal only to be lacking in other areas of my life. I needed to live in the present the way I wanted to live in the future.

Too many times we say we will do something tomorrow, in a week, in a month, or in a year. We say when we have more time, when  we have more energy, or more money. And then the months and years roll by and we realize we still have the same life and are in the same situation we had a few years back.

A biggie for me to take control of was my health. But, first I had to check my mindset. I knew I had tried and failed at things I said I was going to do in the past. But, not this time! I had a deep burning desire in me for change. To change my mindset, change my body, and to make sure I spend time in silence and do things to feed my soul and make myself happy too.

Giving is great. I love giving and helping people. But when we neglect ourselves it only leads to burnout and then we can not help others the way we have been called to. I had experienced this so many times in my life. I realized watching tv every night and not being active was not helping me or anyone else. If I wanted to help others it had to start with loving myself.

It started in my mind first. I started getting back to my personal development. Something I realized I had been missing. I put it to the wayside as I was trying to reach my goals. But, I realized this was key to me reaching my goals. I needed to have a mindset that no matter what I would keep going on. Life loves to throw curveballs. Second I got back to my spiritual practices. This is something I crave. But,  I would lose my passion for silence and spending time with God.

Then in January something magical happened. Exactly what I needed came to me. This is not unusual once you start working on your mind and spending time in silence. Synchronicity is seriously  magical. And pretty cool if I say so myself. (insert unicorn emoji)

So, I found a program that I decided I would take up. I started working out 6 days a week. It was a struggle at first. And a lot harder than I Thought. But, I pushed through because I had my mind set right. I knew I had failed before and I was not going to fail again no matter what. This was not just about losing weight this was about getting healthy and changing my life. So, I pushed through. The nutrition was a little harder for me at first.

I still was struggling with my previous all or nothing mindset. But, this time I decided I would not deprive myself of foods I really wanted. So, I allow myself to once or twice a week have a “happy” meal. This completely changed my nutrition mindset. You know that saying “you always want what you can’t have.” It really freed up my mind from thinking “I’ll never have that again so I want to quit so I can have that.” Real nutrition is about occasionally have a treat meal so you don’t feel deprived and you can keep going without beating yourself up. Even if you do fall off for a few days get back up.

By February my 30th birthday rolled around. And I had lost 4 pounds and 14 inches. My zest for life returned. I actually look forward to getting up in the morning now to workout. I feel like it sets my day up on the right foot.

In February I cleaned up my eating even more. I was even trying some awesome new recipes. (I’ll be posting those in the future. So stay tuned for those.) I always enjoyed cooking and kind of let it fall to the wayside. It’s amazing how making a couple changes can drastically put you on the right path again. By March I had lost even more weight and inches. And I noticed an even bigger change in my mental attitude.

I’m down 11 inches and 10 pounds this month for a total of 12 pounds and 25 inches lost. It’s more than just a physical transformation it’s also a mental transformation. I remember being so worried and obsessed with the future. I knew I was not making myself a priority. And I knew I needed to get healthy and start making myself a priority again. I don’t want to look back and say I didn’t have time to get healthy or I didn’t have time to spend with God or I didn’t have time or energy to become everything I want to be. It’s truly about balance and living the present moment the way you want to live in the future. 

“Realize deeply that the present moment is all you have. Make the NOW the primary focus of your life.”

~Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now