What starting over again is teaching me
I’ve been trying to lose weight….again. It seems like a never endless journey of starting and stopping. I want to lose weight to be healthy and to feel good in my own skin. Something I haven’t had in a very long time.
I look at old pictures of myself , I thought at the time that I was fat, But now I realize I was a perfectly acceptable weight.
I believe an acceptable weight is one where you feel good in your own skin and are able to maintain it in a healthy way.
Depression over these past few years and drinking more then I should have added an extra 20-30 pounds. Not something I’m proud of. At times I wish I could be one of those people that eats whatever they want and doesn’t gain weight but I’ve realized that will never be me. I eat what I want and gain weight. So I’m trying to eat healthy and in moderation.
This week was really tough for me mentally and physically. When I felt stressed, overtired, or depressed I turned to eating too much of the unhealthy foods and picking up the wine.
This morning I was listening to a meditation course on insight timer about kicking the booze. Now I don’t know if I’ll give it up forever. At this point in my life I don’t see that happening but I do realize I need healthier ways to manage my stress, tiredness, and depression. So, This week I will turn to meditation, journaling, and exercise when I feel like my emotions are getting to me.
I’ve probably only really cried twice this past year. I try to be strong but am realizing that being strong is not always healthy. Sometimes releasing your emotions through journaling or crying is the healthiest thing you can do for yourself. And practicing your own self-care makes you better for yourself and others.
So here I am back on Day 1 of eating healthy, exercising, and trying to be my best self. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring but I know that for today I am on the right course.
